St Mary's

Hi, my name is Mike Sherman. Peter asked me some time ago to give a homily on IDENTITY.

JOHN 8:25-32

So they said to him, “Who are you?” Jesus answered:

“What I have told you from the outset.

About you I have much to say and much to condemn;

But the one who sent me is truthful,

And what I have learnt from him

I declare to the world.”

They failed to understand that he was talking to them about the Father. So Jesus said:

“When you have lifted up the Son of Man,

Then you will know that I am He

And that I do nothing of myself:

What the Father has taught me is what I preach;

He who sent me is with me,

And has not left me to myself,

For I always do what pleases him.”

As he was saying this many came to believe in him.

To the Jews who believed in him Jesus said:

“If you make my word your home

You will indeed be my disciples,

You will learn the truth

And the truth will make you free.”

Hi, my name is Mike Sherman. Peter asked me some time ago to give a homily on IDENTITY. Recently Terry began his homily in a way that he said was not an appropriate way to begin a homily by saying that “those who know do not say, and those who say do not know.” Well I am going a step further in saying that you should reject everything I say, unless it resonates with you at a deep level. What I will say is not THE TRUTH, but simply opinions I have formed during my 65 years of conditioning in the world. So as the Buddha said – accept what feels right for you right now, and discard the rest. However, as the Franciscan priest Richard Rohr says, listen with a “BEGINNER’S MIND” or ‘the heart of a child.’

The most important question you can ask yourself is “WHO AM I?” The Sufi mystic, Rumi, said, “You are the truth from head to foot. What else would you like to know?” In today’s Gospel Jesus also makes the same point in John 8:32, “You will learn the truth and the truth will make you free.”

Note that in my introduction, I did not say “I am Mike Sherman” but “My Name is Mike Sherman”. Do you think you are your name? In his wonderful book “Awareness” the Jesuit priest Anthony De Mellow says that once you teach the child the name of the bird, the child will never see the bird again. Your name is merely a label, it is not who you are.

Are you your body? Without doubt this is a common belief. Just look at the emphasis in the world on body image. Now there is nothing inappropriate about respecting and looking after your body. In fact it is important to do so. Just don’t identify with the body. We see this in the outside world with the obsessiveness to keep the body looking young by artificial means. The Buddhists have it right when they say “attach to nothing which is impermanent” and it is pretty obvious that the body fits into this category. Eckhart Tolle has this to say on this point: “The amazing thing about impermanence is that the realization of it opens up in you the dimension of space or stillness, when it is not resisted. This is why many spiritual teachings point to the fact of impermanence of all forms as a teaching device, because the moment you see how fleeting everything is and don’t resist it something in you feels spacious and peaceful.” The body is a great teaching device as it is always in the present moment, but it is not who you are.

In the eastern traditions they also say to “let what comes come, to let what goes go, and then see what remains”. Nothing that comes and goes is you – YOU ARE WHAT REMAINS. Nick Vujicic was born without arms or legs and he certainly didn’t come to grips with this in 5 minutes. Let me quote briefly from his book, “Life Without Limits” – ‘It took me a long time to see the benefits of the circumstances I was born into. I found happiness when I realised that as imperfect as I may be, I am the perfect Nick Vujicic. I am God’s creation, designed to his plan for me.”

This is what John Quincy Adams said three days before he died:

John Quincy Adams is well, but the house in which he lives at the present time is becoming dilapidated. It’s tottering on its foundations. Time and the seasons have nearly destroyed it. Its roof is pretty well worn out. Its walls are shattered and tremble with every wind. I think John Quincy Adams will have to move out of it soon. But he, himself, is quite well, thank you.

Now I have no idea who John Quincy Adams was, except that he is no longer with us; but it is obvious he was beyond identifying with the body.

Are you one of the roles that you play? If so, how would you fare if you lose your job, retire, the children leave home, or someone criticizes your religion or football team? You are not any of the roles that you play. Certainly play the roles as well as you can and enjoy any resulting achievements. Just don’t identify with them or you will set yourself up to suffer.

So, who are you? There are many models used in psychology and spirituality to attempt to explain this intellectually. Of course you will never come to understand who you are through your mind. As John Wheeler says in his book, “Awakening to the Natural State” – “Trying to understand your true nature with the mind is like a dog trying to understand calculus” – but models of the self can be useful pointers. Most models use 2 selves. We have personality/spirituality, false self/real self, lower self/higher self, ego/spirit, I/Me, conditioned mind/unconditioned mind, thinking self/observing self, head/heart, Tao/10000things. Use whichever model suits you. It is not a matter of being right or wrong but looking at what is helpful or not helpful for you.

Let’s have a look at the poem below by the Sufi poet and mystic, Rumi. It is called “The Guest House”.

THE GUEST HOUSE

This being human is a guest house,

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

Some momentary awareness comes

As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,

Who violently sweep your house

Empty of its furniture.

Still treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out

For some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.

Meet them at the door laughing, and

Invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,

Because each has been sent

As a guide from beyond.

Your life is the Guest House. The guests are all the thoughts, emotions and experiences that come into your life. Guests are not meant to stay. They come and go. Some stay longer than others and some keep returning more than others, but they are all only temporary visitors. The host is always there and is the Consciousness which is aware of the guests coming and going. All that changes is not you. YOU ARE THIS AWARENESS. YOU ARE THE HOST. The host welcomes all guests, meeting them at the door laughing, and inviting them in because the host is conscious that there is something to be learnt from each guest. So when you can be aware of all your thoughts, feelings and experiences without judgment, and with a sense of humour and gratitude, you have become the “detached witness” that Buddhists talk about. You are then living from your true self rather than mistakenly identifying yourself with your body and mind. As Christ emphasized, “Be in the world, but not of it.”

So in essence you are not your mind or your personality or your ego, but the consciousness which is aware of these things. Now the big problem we then strike is thinking that mind, ego, personality are all bad or wrong and we need to put in this almighty effort to “fix” them. Well that won’t get you there.

In the “Wisdom of the Enneagram” Don Riso and Russ Hudson made this statement, which is so relevant to this idea:

“One of the major obstacles to transformation is the idea that we can “fix” ourselves….The idea that we simply need to discover and accept who we are is contrary to almost everything we have been taught.”

So how do we go about discovering experientially who we are? We embark on this journey from Ego to Spirit, which is really the Christian “death / resurrection” story, by becoming the detached observer of who we are not. Observe your thoughts and feelings in your everyday relationships, but do this with as little judgment as possible. It is a matter of shining light on the darkness to dispel it, not a matter of fighting the darkness. In a sense then it is the Holy Spirit (or Higher Self) doing the work, not your Egoic Self. We do this also by taking opportunities to bring ourselves into “stillness” in nature or in meditation. Rainer Maria Rilke says that “There is only one Journey. Going inside your self.”

Consider the following story:

There are 2 opposing groups in Spain the Catalanes and the Madrilenos. The 2 tenors, Placido Domingo and Jose Carreras, were in opposite camps. In 1984 they became enemies and consequently refused to perform with each other. Then in 1987 Carreras was diagnosed with leukaemia. His numerous treatments eventually depleted his substantial finances, but he discovered a foundation in Madrid whose sole purpose was the support of treatment for leukaemia sufferers. Through this foundation support Carreras conquered the disease and returned to singing. When he later attempted to join the foundation he discovered that the founder and leading contributor was Placido Domingo, who originally founded the foundation to help him with his treatment, but had chosen to remain anonymous in order not to humiliate him in accepting help from his enemy.

You are “God in disguise” and so is everyone and everything else. It is just that you block off your awareness of this with excessive, compulsive, involuntary thinking.

The American spiritual teacher, Gangaji, has this to say about your connection with God:

“The root of all suffering is the belief, and the continual practice of the belief, that you are separate from pure, limitless consciousness; that you are a separate entity, and that you are located in a separate body.”

Let me finish with a beautiful explanation that I came across of the meaning of the greeting, NAMASTE.

“I honour the place in you where everything in the Universe resides;

I honour the place in you of love, of light, of truth, and of peace;

And when you are in that place in you, and I am in that place in me;

There is only one of us.”

NAMASTE